Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Right 'round

No reason, except that I had to Napster the new version so that I can play it for HEY later. "I don't know if I've ever even heard the original version." Whatever. And guess what, I didn't know there was a new version until tonight. Ha. I'm so cool.

I'm sitting in the driveway in the van because I dropped off 2 of the kids at a rehearsal and the rest of the kids, who have been home sick all day, fell asleep on the way home. Unwilling to drag 3 sleeping kids in and back out again in an hour, I just ran in to grab my laptop and pretend to study/write a paper. And download Right Round.

School was going well. I finished all but one class I had picked for this term in the first month. But now, a research paper... I started it the beginning of October and I have a thesis statement and...some research saved in my folder in the virtual library and...a couple of articles picked out to add to the annotated bibliography I had planned to finish the first week and...that's it. I don't know why exactly I'm dragging my feet on this. It's fairly ridiculous. As soon as I finish it, I can move on to classes I like again. I really want to move on to classes I like again. Classes that I can finish and feel accomplished again. I have a new, firm goal now though - must be done by Thanksgiving Break. If it's not, I might as well shoot for my original deadline (set by my mentor because we didn't know I was going to bust out 4 classes in the first month) of January 7. I can do this.

Hmm, my left ear just went silent except for some ringing. That's a weird and unpleasant feeling. It's a good thing my job doesn't depend on being able to hear things. Oh, wait...

I am actually kind of excited for Christmas this year. Generally, Christmas is usually bittersweet for me. The last time I spent Christmas with my family (sibling, parents) was 1998. Christmas growing up was always awesome, mostly because of family and family traditions and grandparents and cousins and games and etc. etc. etc. and quirky presents from my dad (matching hairdryers x3 for me and my sisters). And so Christmas has been kind of this giant reminder that Hey!! You live so very far away from all these people that you love and what if you never get to spend another Christmas with your grandparents? I don't know if it's because we did get to see so many this summer on the Epic Road Trip or just more resolve to just do the best I can to make Christmas awesome for my kids (note, I do usually do that, the bittersweetness stays inside) or maybe that there is a glimmer of hope that we will someday, SOMEDAY move closer or that in general, maybe, there's a glimmer of hope as I maybe, maybe get out of this funk that I've been in for way tooooo long, anyway...I'm actually kind of excited for Christmas this year. Making plans and all that jazz.

And now, it's time to go fetch the girls from rehearsal.


madhousewife said...

I get that ringing in my ear sometimes, too. Have for about 20 years. Good news is that it hasn't gotten worse.

annie valentine said...

You know, until my mother in law came along I loved every single Christmas of my life. She's managed to taint the last eleven of them. This is our last year living by her, I can't wait to put half the globe between us.

evitafjord said...

It is tricky. My inlaws moved this year and so this year all of the holidays are up to us and whatever we want to do. Like going to a buffet restaurant for Thanksgiving and then to a movie (Tangled), which the kids are so excited about. Or skipping town all together for Christmas to head to Seaworld. We're not, but we considered it and it was an option that did not have opposition aside from financial and church commitments.